Bad Religion

I often find myself in situations of unrequited love. From friends, family, and even partners that I never really had. I realized that I always come second (in my mind, I know I’m like #56). I know that love is patient, but I’ve been waiting all my life. I mean God has placed so many great people in my life, but I still unseen, unnoticed. I mean attention is one thing, but being genuinely loved is another. I don’t want to have to expose myself to get attention. I don’t want to have to post my ass, because I know you’ll respond. I don’t want to have to act silly for my friends to laugh at my jokes. I just want to love and be loved. To have a partner I can hold on to on sad nights. To have a friend I can confide into genuinely. I just want the love I never had. You say you care about me, but I’m the girl you hit up every three months. You say you got me, but every time I ask for help it’s a “no can do” from you. I just want to be shown different in all of my relationships. To be someone’s number one. Someone who is willing to fight for our relationship, not let it fall through their hands.If you’re my friend or my lover, I just want you to know that I love you. Because I love hard and it’s not easy for me to hate. I will love you unconditionally as God has planned. To all the boys who wanted me, I’m sorry I’m not the girl for you (maybe I am, SPEAK UP), but I will always care for you and have love for you in my heart. To my friends who don’t care for me, I don’t need you but I wish the best for you and because of my kind, genuine heart you will always have a friend in me.

This idea of unrequited love has consumed me, because that’s all I feel…

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