I wanna know (old piece)

I wrote this two years ago when I was very much in like with a boy. Two years later, I don’t care to know, but enjoy!

I wanna know who you kissing. Who you’re touching. Who you’re loving. Who you’re holding. Because ever since we called this quits, I can’t get you off of my mind. You just left me, like you didn’t enter my home every Monday through Sunday from sun up to sundown. Like you didn’t kiss me and caress me. Don’t act like you know me and don’t try to write off the feelings you have for me. And yes this is all in the past, but we both know that I am your present and your future. See I tried to move on, but I was caught up with you that I took a tumble landing on my face. When I saw you and the new chick, I just had to repent. Kept in the dark for so long that no one knew. Telling my friends that it’s my idea to keep us in the dark, spending most of our time hiding in blind sight. You don’t wanna know what I know. Because what I know ain’t even the worst parts about you. It’s the best. And baby I know you’re the best, so I’m putting you through test, because I don’t wanna end up where I’m at now. Broken-hearted. It’s not fair to you nor me that we keep this a secret. But are we even a “we” anymore, because it’s been weeks since I last heard your voice. You ain’t even try to pick up the phone and I know it works both ways, but I just want you to do it first. Cause if I pick up that phone and you yell at me in pain, I might not ever be the same. So I wanna know what you been up to lately. I wanna know what chick got you sprung this time. Cause it came out the blue and I thought we were good, but you got so caught up in your life that you forgot that I was you’re future wife. Writing me off like I don’t mean shit, when three weeks ago, you were on your knees saying baby please. I wanna know what you’re thinking about. Who you’re thinking about. And why you’re thinking about what you’re thinking about. I’m tired of finding everything about you from others or coincidentally coming across your personal information. I mean I don’t even know your middle name, but I found it out through a piece of paper. And I felt weird that I even knew that before you even had a chance to tell me. Baby it ain’t fair, but me and you both know how it ends. We could be so beautiful, but you’re too caught up in your world and I’m just too stubborn to call and maybe it’s my fault. It’s my flaw. But if you cared like you said you did, then you wouldn’t let me fall. You’d catch me and tell me you got me, but I haven’t gotten a single call. So I wanna know how you been doing, who you been doing, and what you have been doing. I hope that one day we can work this out and find common ground cause I don’t wanna be without you. So I just wanna know…what are we going to do?

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